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The Good, The Bad and The Scary – May 11, 2009

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The economy sucks and everyone’s feeling the pinch — even Hollywood isn’t immune. This week brought some bad news about projects that had possibilities, but the outlook isn’t totally crummy: A decent sequel is always welcome, as is horror news from the Left Coast’s It Guy. So on to the good…


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The Good
Rank Movie
1 nightmare-on-elm-street-freddy-headshot-small-75x75.jpg A Nightmare on Elm Street
The casting keeps getting better: The latest addition is veteran actor Clancy Brown, who stole the show as Frankenstein’s monster in The Bride. I’ll see this just for him, assuming he has more than a cameo.
2 halloween-75x75.jpg H2
A leaked plot synopsis indicates we’re in for some surprises, including an “unlikely hero.” Web buzz trends to thinking that means Laurie Strode… but how is she “unlikely?” I can’t wait to find out who it really is.
3 rec75x75.jpg [REC] 2
Claustrophobic Spanish zombie shocker [REC] was remade as Quarantine, one of my 2008 favorites. Now it’s getting a sequel in its native land, due to open October 9. Watch either version: They’re both good.
4 darktower75x75.jpg The Dark Tower
It’s probably inevitable that Stephen King’s sprawling epic would get the feature-film treatment, weak economy be damned. But can it be done right? J.J. Abrams says he’s up for the job, so it has a chance.
5 DragMeToHell75x75.jpg Drag Me to Hell
Sam Raimi
‘s return to horror barely squeaks into the good column. The trailer looks ridiculous, but two new TV spots suggest it might be ridiculously fun. Emphasis on might. This one’s still on probation.

…and now it’s my sad duty to present… the Bad.


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The Bad
Rank Movie
-1 piranha-3d75x75.jpg Piranha 3-D
Ving Rhames, Elisabeth Shue, a bunch of unknowns and now Jerry O’Connell and Dina Meyer. Don’t they have enough actors? Maybe they could just make the damned killer-fish movie already…
-2 lauramars75x75.jpg twisted classic written by John Carpenter isn’t happening.The official reason: Creative differences — the studio said Carpenter’s script wasn’t enough like the original. I’m sorry… come again?
-3 twilight2-75x75.jpg Eclipse
David Slade (30 Days of Night) once declared he wouldn’t see Twilight at gunpoint: No wonder Twihards were pissed he was helming Eclipse. He now says he’s read the books and understands the “beautifully honest characters.” Spare shovel, anybody?
-4 predator75x75.jpg Predators
What a tease! Robert Rodriguez isn’t directing and doesn’t know who is, though he’s picked a writer, Alex Litvak, who has one credit to his name… a movie still in production. I want my youthful sense of optimism back!
-5 mandylane75x75.jpg All the Boys Love Mandy Lane
The movie that refused to be born: It’s been bounced from date to date for years and has now been shelved with a “TBD” release date. Which means all the boys will have to love someone else.

Jeez, Hollywood… you had me all excited last week and now it comes to this?

David Wellington is a horror novelist whose latest book is Vampire Zero. He lives in New York City with his wife Elisabeth and his dog Mary, named after Mary Shelley, the author of Frankenstein.

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