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The Good and The Bad – April 27, 2009

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This week the horror-verse is abuzz about casting: Bizarre casting, intriguing casting and righteous casting in the form of a star willing to stand up for a franchise. Not to mention the first sign of the apocalypse: A Stephen King movie can’t attract financing. All this and more in this week’s The Good and The Bad… speaking of which, I really want to hear suggestions for new names for this column. Speak up, please! I’d take it as a personal favor.

Think our rankings are off base, out of touch or hopelessly lame? Speak up here!


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The Good
Rank Movie
1 seventh_moon75x75.jpg Seventh Moon
Blair Witch Project co-director Eduardo Sanchez returns to horror with this story of tourists in China running afoul of the “Hungry Ghosts” festival. The trailer looks great and early reviews are positive.
2 nightmare-on-elm-street-freddy-headshot-small-75x75.jpg A Nightmare on Elm Street
“Remake” is a dirty word, these days and rightly so. But the Nightmare casting is encouraging: Fresh-faced girl-next-door Rooney Mara (Urban Legends: Bloody Mary) has signed as Nancy and just might be perfect.
3 bubba_nosferatu75x75.jpg Bubba Nosferatu
We recently reported the bold choice to cast Ron Perlman in the Bubba Ho-Tep sequel (even he can’t figure out why he should be Elvis). How to up the ante? Try Paul Giamatti as Col. Tom Parker — that’s chutzpah!
4 halloween-75x75.jpg H2
The trailer raises more questions than it answers, but it seems Rob Zombie is both taking his cue from the original sequels and laying claim to the follow-up to his remake. My head hurts, but maybe in a good way.
5 hellboy75x75.jpg Hellboy 3
Guillermo del Toro is booked for the next five years, but Universal wants another Hellboy sequel. Kudos to Ron Perlman, who stood up and said he he won’t do it unless del Toro at least writes the screenplay.

…and when the news is bad, it’s very, very bad.


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The Bad
Rank Movie
-1 piranha-3d75x75.jpg Piranha 3D
The original has its fans, but I’m not one. Ving Rhames and Elisabeth Shue star in the remake, and Richard Dreyfuss is making a cameo because he was in some killer fish movie. No, not Killer Fish… this one .
-2 final_destination3d75x75.jpg Final Destination: Death Trip 3D
I want to see the evil escalator scene… really. But FD: DT 3D is in reshoots — common these days, but still indicative of a movie in trouble. It’s scheduled for an August 28th release, so they’ll need to work fast.
-3 constantine75x75.jpg Constantine 2
X-Men Origins: Wolverine producer producer Lauren Shuler Donner is looking for a writer. Only one? It took three to mess up one of the best comic books ever. No word on whether Keanu is returning.
-4 from-a-buick875x75.jpg From a Buick 8
Stephen King wrote it, Tobe Hooper was set to direct, everyone liked the script and it’s on hold because… they couldn’t get financing? The filmmakers blame the economy. And I thought Hollywood was immune!
-5 twilight2-75x75.jpg Eclipse
David Slade (30 Days of Night) will direct the third movie in the unstoppable franchise, and the blogosphere is scratching its collective head. Why would he do that? Apparently they’ve never heard of this thing we call “money.”

Disagree with my rankings? Want to tell me how brilliant I am? Want me to stop talking about Twilight, for crying out loud? Take a chance, hotshot. Take a chance on… comments!

David Wellington is a horror novelist whose latest book is Vampire Zero. He lives in New York City with his wife Elisabeth and his dog Mary, named after Mary Shelley, the author of Frankenstein.

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