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The Good and The Bad – April 13, 2009

This week, we’re putting the Power Ranking aside. There was just such a divide between the top five and the bottom five that they didn’t look right all together in the same list. So instead we’re doing things a bit differently this time around. Up front: The good stuff, the movies we’re actually looking forward to. After the jump: The bottom of the barrel… if you’ve got the stomach for it.

Think our rankings are off base, out of touch or hopelessly lame? Speak up here!


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The Good
Rank Movie
1 burrowers75x75.jpg The Burrowers
Lionsgate paid for this atmospheric horror Western by director J.T. Petty ( Soft for Digging ), then shoehorned it into a lackluster DVD-only release. That should be bad, right? Wrong: It turns out the movie is so great it’s getting glowing reviews and major press online.
2 nightmare-on-elm-street-freddy-headshot-small-75x75.jpg A Nightmare on Elm Street
If you have to remake a classic horror flick from the ’80s, why not one that would benefit from new cinematic technologies? The people behind this re-do aren’t stinting on human resources either. The new Freddy? Jackie Earle Haley (Watchmen). I can totally see it.
3 halloween-75x75.jpg Halloween 2
This one’s growing on us. It may or may not have a new title; everyone online is still calling it H2. It’s still getting lots of silly press. But you know what? All the hoopla is working — I’m starting to look forward to seeing Rob Zombie’s latest. The guy makes entertaining movies, and he’s definitely a friend to the fans.
4 ghostbusters375x75.jpg Ghostbusters 3
Initial reports that this sequel would send the team and their proton packs to Hell were apparently false, so turn off your spoiler alarms. The good news? The entire original cast is coming back — including Rick Moranis. Bring back my teen crush Annie Potts and I’ll see it twice.
5 hellraiser75x75.jpg Hellraiser
April 21 sees a new DVD-set release of the first two movies in the series (the good ones), including the original on Blu-Ray. The best part? They’re packaged in a replica of the puzzle box from the movies. Bonus points if you were about to comment and tell me it’s really called the Lament Configuration.

Now for the bad news…


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The Bad
Rank Movie
-1 saw75x75.jpg Saw VI
If it’s Halloween it must be… meh. Does anyone besides bored teenagers watch these things anymore? This one gets its own licensed multiplayer video game for promotion, so devotees can torture their friends with fiendish traps that combine to form a puzzle of… unrelenting tedium.
-2 silenthill75x75.jpg Silent Hill 2
Radha Mitchell says there’ll probably be a sequel someday, and that she may or may not be in it; if so, she might want to play a monster. She also says Christophe Gans isn’t likely to be the director of this movie that may or may not happen. This isn’t a story, people, so stop reporting it!
-3 terrortrain75x75.jpg Terror Train
There are two kinds of people in this world: Those who know this movie was remade last year as Train, starring Thora Birch, and those who understand that that movie wasn’t a true remake, and that the one being shot now is the real remake of the real movie that nobody remembers.  
-4 FourFlies75x75.jpg Four Flies on Grey Velvet
Dario Argento’s lost giallo classic finally gets a Region 1 DVD release, and America rejoices, right? Put that party hat down, pal. Rumor has it that Argento is planning to sue Universal because he says they stole the copyright from him. DVDs may be pulled from store shelves.
-5 twilight2-75x75.jpg Twilight
Like a vampire, it will not die. Like a vampire, it sucks the life from young women. But Mormon Twilight series author Stephanie Meyer probably never envisioned this: Twihards can now practice a new religion called Cullenism. When they die, the faithful get to live with their favorite dreamboat vampire. Count us out.
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