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Horror Power Ranking List – July 7, 2008

This week’s Horror Power Rankings is all about challenges. No, not the challenges of putting together a Horror Ranking list when we’re in the dead zone of the summer horror release schedule. (Though that would be a fair guess, and thank you for understanding what a tough job this is, it’s very much appreciated.) Instead, this week we’ve got a challenge from a Monsterfest writer, two challenges from me to you guys and the results of a challenge one of you posed last week. So let’s get to them, shall we?

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Horror Power Rankings
Rank LW   Movie (or Comic, etc.)
1 tokyo-gore-police-75x75.jpg Tokyo Gore Police
Now, I know Grady Hendrix was putting out a general challenge in his review, saying, “You can’t handle Tokyo Gore Police.” But I feel like he’s writing directly to me. So Grady? You’re on. I think I can handle TGP. Now, what? Now, what?
2 6 xfiles-75x75.jpg The X-Files: I Want to Believe
Speaking of challenges, last week, Monstefest reader Whitney challenged me to watch several X-Files episodes. Well, I took that challenge, and… I’m now way more excited for this movie. Nice one, Whitney. Or should I say… GILLIAN ANDERSON???
3 hellboy2-75x75.jpg Hellboy II: The Golden Army
I challenged myself to go see a screening of Hellboy II, which was tough, as I hated the first movie. Turns out, this is a fun little surprise, with some utterly fantastic horror touches. Even if you haven’t seen the first one, you’ll enjoy this sequel.
4 2 mummy-75x75.jpg The Mummy: Tomb of the Dragon Emperor
OK, new challenge for you guys this week: To get yourselves excited for this next Brendan Fraser adventure, watch The Mummy, Monkeybone, and Blast From The Past. We’ll all meet back here next week, and see how that went, OK?
5 3 repo-75x75.jpg Repo: The Genetic Opera
Now that we finally have a release date for the horror musical (November 7), I know that I can take the enormous amount of excitement and enthusiasm I have for the flick, and pace it out over the course of the next 18 weeks. Easy, right?
6 9 mirrors-75x75.jpg Mirrors
You’ve got my heart going like a ping pong ball. You get me all excited, then shoot me down, then you release a Red Band trailer with *SPOILER* Amy Smart tearing her own face off. *SPOILER* Check one, Mirrors: Are you awesome, or not?
7 5 hapening-75x75.jpg The Happening
Coming back here every week and staring at Mark Wahlberg’s concerned/confused expression is starting to make me hate this movie a little bit. Is that silly? Is it petty? Or maybe, just maybe, I should think about changing the picture?
8 4 midnight-meat-train.jpg Midnight Meat Train
Clive Barker can defend this as much as he wants. He can beg fans to write Lionsgate and ask for a bigger release than the 100 theaters they have planned. But at the end of the day, it will still be called Midnight Meat Train.
9 8 fridaythe13th.jpg Friday the 13th
Producers: Why are you making this? Is it to make a quick buck? Bring back the slasher genre? Or is it to explore what drives a lonely young boy to become a merciless killer? And if it’s the last one, remember: We don’t care.
10 10 twilight.jpg Twilight
Here’s my last challenge, and it’s for you, the readers: At this point, I’m only leaving Twilight on here to be spiteful. So, come up with a good reason for me to kick Twilight off the Power Rankings, and I’ll do so. But it’s gotta be really, really good.


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