We’ve got a bunch of new readers thanks to the success of our Bijou Phillips interview. Her safety-pin trick intrigued a lot of folks. I thought this would be a good time to go over some of the unique terms and vocabulary we use here, so you can orient yourself.
Goatlings – Our readers. That’s you!
Blime – Blog time. The amount of time we spend discussing a certain issue.
Rema*e or Re*ake: A classic film recycled for no reason other than the producer hopes to trade on its reputation
Splasher: An extra extra gory horror movie with a single serial killer as the antagonist.
Horrody: An intentionally funny horror movie like Sean of the Dead
Steve: A straight to video production. A movie without a theatrical release. Sometimes referred to as a Stanley Stever.
Laura La-Z-Boy: generic name for a conservative resident of flyover country who likes her horror sanitized.
Taking Giallo Shots: Having a party where you and your friends watch several Italian horror films in a row. A horror slumber party where the host could, perhaps, make Giallo 1-2-3.
Cougar: A terrible special effect that brings you out of the movie. The inflated plastic bag that is supposed to be a beating heart in Hellraiser for example.
Vicki: Generic name for someone killed in a horror movie.
Q: Can I get an example of some of these?
A: I tell you, goatlings, that neck scar was such a cougar, I couldn’t tell if the girl in the noose was the Vicki or if it was the viewer. So bad, it should have been a Steve. We’ve already wasted too much blime on this lame splasher re*ake, I’m sure Laura La-Z-Boy has clicked elsewhere.
Q: Wasn’t this more of a glossary than a proper FAQ?
A: I reckon so
Q: Why isn’t it in alphabetical order?
A: The only place "organization" comes before "horror blog" is in the dictionary.
Q: Uh, no it doesn’t.